Episode 14 of the Living Life Well Show: Mindset and Overcoming Trauma with Anne Trevino
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[00:00:00] Welcome to the Living Life Well Show, the intersection of God's Word, today's science, and healthy living with common sense application, all based on the truth of the Word of God. I'm your host, Dr. Jon Skelton. Now let's get straight to the truth. Well, welcome back to the living life. Well, show I'm really excited today to have a special guest with me Anne Trevino Anne has been a licensed professional counselor for the last five years. And she's who I really recommend. All my people go to for all things mindset or help with anxiety and depression, even trauma.
She has some really great work that she does with our clients. So, Anne welcome, welcome to the living life. Well show. Hi, thank you for having me. Yeah, [00:01:00] yeah, I'm glad you're here. So tell us just a little bit about yourself, kind of what got you into starting your private practice, what kind of things that you do and enjoy in that.
Yeah, so I started my private practice, , close to about four to five years ago. I've been in LPC for quite a while. I've worked in school counseling, but Once 2020 hit, , there was a such a huge need for practitioners. And so, I helped, you know, I kind of just started, you know, contracting and going out on my own and you know, helping people that way.
I focused primarily on, , anxiety, depression, trauma. I do some couples therapy too. So those are, those are kind of the areas where I focus my practice and, have been working with different individuals that way. Okay. Okay. Great. And so I know that you're, you are trauma certified.
So describe to me [00:02:00] how You know, trauma has historically been thought of and how you really see it manifest itself in your practice today and how we might need to kind of change the narrative of how we think about trauma. Yeah. So, I mean, I think a lot of times when people hear the word trauma, I know. I used to think of it this way, used to think of like, you know, having to go to the hospital, you know, because you've gotten into a car accident or, some severe injury has happened.
But I don't think that we ever think about, you know, injury to our brain through emotional responses or, you know, things that happen in our daily lives that can elicit a type of trauma response. Cause what happens when you're in a situation where a traumatic event is happening, your amygdala starts firing.
And then you automatically start into that fight, flight, freeze, or fawn , state but that can happen in emotional situations and arguments and things that happen [00:03:00] throughout your life, living in a very dangerous part of your city, you know, living in a high violence area that can cause traumatic, traumatic events to happen because you're constantly in a state of fight, fight, freeze, or fawn.
And so it's. It's just interesting. And as I started to learn more about it, you start to learn about all the different things in your life that can be considered traumatic events when you're having this type of response. And so it's about identifying some of those things, you know, some of those things in your history or in your life that possibly have caused, you know, trauma to you and then working through those and figuring out how to not have those same responses when you're dealing with, you know, situations that mirror or are similar to what you had experienced in the past.
Yeah, so you're talking about that, that kind of adrenal surge that happens when [00:04:00] we are posed with a potential threat. And so, as we grow up, we, you know, see these potential threats in all different ways. So tell us a little bit about what kind of the most common things are and if there are some common triggers that you're seeing with your clients and how you might kind of combat those feelings in general you know, of, of kind of that response, helping to, to lower that response so that we're not like Trying to run from a lion or a bear or something and having that type of surge of hormones going through our body.
Yeah. So a lot of the things that I typically deal with in my practice it's kind of family trauma. I deal with a lot of clients who have just kind of toxic family relationships and dynamics. And so, and that causes trauma , when you grow up with someone in your [00:05:00] family who has, or suffers from a mental illness that really impacts the family.
And so I think those are some of the things that I'm seeing in my practice, like a parent who was addicted to drugs or a parent had mental illness that was untreated. And so, You know, it's impacting the entire family. It's impacting the interactions between, you know, parent and child. And so, I, I deal with that a lot.
I see that a lot. But there's many, many different things that can cause trauma in a family. Divorce, incarcerated parent, , like I said a parent on drugs of course, sexual abuse, physical abuse, all of those things you know, can cause trauma. But when I am dealing with a, an adult who had suffered some, you know, family trauma growing up, just because of a parent being addicted to drugs or a parent, you know, having some type of mental illness that was untreated.
We really have to focus on the person's mindset because everything is so [00:06:00] twisted in, in the way in the, in the things that they believe about themselves or about how relationships go. And so I really have to backtrack and really work through those things and. define what a real relationship is, or, you know, plot those lies that they believe about themselves because of, you know, this situation or the way they were treated in their family.
And so we really go back and explore their past and, figure out what they believe about themselves. What they believe to be true about relationships and then start building from there and, reframing those thought patterns and reframing those thoughts that they have about themselves.
Yeah, yeah, I think that's so true, especially, you know, the way you describe it as, as lies, Craig Groeschel wrote a book recently called "Winning the War In Your Mind". And, and he talks about the, the lies that we believe and how we need [00:07:00] to a, be able to identify and then, what you're talking about with regards to how we come to believing lies can be kind of difficult to see, and I really call that kind of blind spots, right? And so, so when I have clients come in, I like to, have them go through a blind spot evaluation, with you. And, and so what do you kind of do in that process to help people discover those blind spots, be it either in, you know, moving forward with a health improvement program or any other area, is there some sort of commonality that you are able to project into that situation to, to help them a number one.
See that there is a lie that they're believing and then two kind of the process to try and reframe that so that they can see and believe the actual truth. Yeah, [00:08:00] so it's interesting if you think about, your thought patterns, unfortunately, as human beings, for whatever reason, we are primarily negative when we think about things, you know, we don't just walk around thinking everything sunshine and rainbows, we, we tend to have a little dark cloud over our thought process.
And so it's important that I try to figure out how negative a person is because the level of negativity that all individuals think about themselves or think about their lives differs, right? You know, some people are very, very dark and negative, and some people just have a negative thought here or there.
And so I try to figure out how negative their thinking is. But then I also want them to think about what they think about, so it's important for them to focus on where their thoughts lead them throughout the day. And, , it's an exercise that they have to do. Usually it takes a little bit, but you know, just trying to [00:09:00] think about what they think about and think about where those thoughts lead them on a daily basis.
And so once we have that pattern established, then we can really start reframing and refuting some of those lies and the things that they think about themselves or. The way they feel about their future, their ability. Yeah. Yeah. You know, the, the thing that I always say when I meet with clients is it's, it's going to be things that, that you think are kind of always or never, or I have to, I can't kind of things.
And, and so, you know, thinking that someone, something is always going to be the way it is. Yeah. It's not going to change whether it's a good situation or a bad situation. Probably not reality, right? So, you know, so learning to kind of, identify what those things are. And, and I really recommend that, , my people do a log and do a log of their daily activities and, and really.
Understand [00:10:00] how those thought processes are affecting them physically and their thoughts in general and how they are responding either maybe with fatigue or a headache or, you know, pain somewhere, especially after a negative interaction, with someone. So are there any other ways that you kind of help people to try and be able to get to that area of recognition?
So one of the things, one of the tools I like to use and some clients like it, some don't, , you mentioned a log, of course, I have, I have them, journal and things like that journal, their thoughts and stuff like that. So that's super important. But some of my clients really like to do videos.
So they'll do a video of themselves. Like I tell, I tell them, you know, when you get into a state where you're really emotional and you're feeling really down or something you know. Do a video of, of what you're feeling and how you're feeling and, and talk about it. Just, just spew everything, you know, just get it all out.
And so they'll do [00:11:00] that. And so they have a record of it. And what's interesting, what I find is when they go back and watch it, they're able to look at themselves and be like, wow, that was really silly that I was thinking that way. Or I was upset about this situation and defining myself. In this moment because of the way that I felt, , at that time.
Yeah, so I like to have my clients do video diaries and, you know, talk about their, you know, emotions or their thought processes. Sometimes it's in relation to when they've, you know, experienced something in there, they become upset. And what's been really interesting about them doing video diaries is that they can go back and watch it and then they can.
Refute some of the things that, they're saying about themselves, they're saying about their situation. And so it becomes a healing process. And it, it shows them, you know, [00:12:00] how their thought patterns are not accurate and how they are. Lying to them and it helps them be able to heal and start forming new thought patterns there.
Yeah. And I, and I think specifically when somebody is trying something. And you know, actions kind of revolve around what they see as success or failure, right? And when, when I'm talking goals with clients and, you know, and, and specifically, , a lot of clients will have a some sort of. Physical goal, either something that they want to accomplish physically with like an athletic challenge or a physical challenge or something that they want to be able to do on a daily basis or, , weight loss and so.
And we all end up having these ideas in our head about how fast or how easy or how hard it's [00:13:00] going to be to, to achieve those goals. So how do you help people kind of look at success and, and failure when they tend to have that more negative mindset? Yeah, especially in like when in terms of thinking about like results, you know, especially physical results and things like that.
It's, it's very challenging because we live in that instant gratification world, you know, and so, it's very. it's very difficult to change their thought patterns and their mindset in regards to, you know, losing weight or getting in shape and stuff like that. So it's very important. I, I kind of just try to drill into them that, you know, small steps.
You need to set small goals to be able to look at the long term effects. And so, you know, when you're thinking about health or getting in shape or losing weight or even just changing a bad [00:14:00] habit, you know, you have to look at the long term. It's a marathon. It is not a sprint. And so you have to
set those short term goals. If, let's say somebody wants to lose 10, then I say, let's Let's look at this over a long, long term kind of thing. And let's start small. What can you do week one that's going to help you achieve that goal? And then once they've gotten into that pattern and they're able to, you know, still, Do that thing, whatever it is, then we add something else, you know, what can you do now, in addition to this first thing to help you achieve that 10 pound weight loss or, or whatever it is their goal that they're trying to achieve.
Yeah. And so, redefining success, you know, maybe week one isn't actually even doing anything physically with increased exercise or eating differently, maybe it is. [00:15:00] Looking at your schedule to determine, Hey, where can I fit some increased physical activity in or, or how can I even start to help my eating be more successful?
And so that that is success in and of itself. Preparation for moving you towards your goal is not useless. It's, it's very important. And so I tend to be a ready fire aim kind of guy a lot of times. And so, but that, that ready aim and fire is really, you know, important. And so. Really making sure you define the goal and define some steps to to get there getting started is good I don't want you to get stuck in paralysis by analysis but you know really making sure that you have a couple of little steps that you're moving forward because sometimes just Even getting started, putting the shoes on to, to go [00:16:00] outside and, and do some physical activity can be tough, especially when you're in pain.
So, so, so I think that's really important, you know, one of the things I see that really kind of grip people a lot with regards to any situation it is anxiety. I see a lot of people come to me. And they are very, worried about the future. They're very worried about the right now, and they're concerned about what condition they may or may not have.
And rightly so. It's important to be concerned about your health, but What I see today now with Dr. Google and all the other resources that are out there is a lot of really severe anxiety that is going around because we almost have too much information. There's too much possibility of.
What it could be. So how do you really help [00:17:00] clients who seem to be in that mode of anxiety and fear about the future? What kind of things do you help encourage them to implement and do to really help overcome that? You said it right there. Anxiety is fear. That is exactly what anxiety is.
It's, it's the fear of the unknown. And, when we focus on things that we can't control or we don't know, it creates anxiety. It creates even more fear in those situations. So when you're dealing with a person who has anxiety, you have to bring them back to the present You have to do things that get them to Understand and be present because when you are in that anxiety, hamster wheel of thoughts, you are not present at all.
You are thinking and preparing or trying to prepare for something [00:18:00] that hasn't happened or may not even happen. And so it's very, very important to bring people back to the present, have them focus on their present and not, relive the past. Or try to predict the future. And, we do that, do this through like mindfulness techniques you know, doing things just, , if you go for a walk, , notice the things that are around you, notice the air, notice the sounds, notice the sites, , things like that.
And. Just doing that in practice a lot really helps to calm a person and stop those, racing thoughts if they can just focus on the present and what they can do in the present. Yeah. Yeah. So absolutely. When you're, when you're in that mode of anxiety or anxiety seems to have a daily effect on you to, to some degree and, and granted anxiety can be [00:19:00] rooted in physical dysfunction that is.
Triggering anxiety and increasing those fight or flight hormones and, and really activating those adrenals so, so it's always important to.
Really, know the source of anxiety could be coming from. And, , you're talk about going out outside , one of the things that, that I really encourage my clients is just to pause, pause and practice some gratitude, gratitude for, the air, the sunshine, the rain, the wind what, whatever the case may be.
I really recommend doing that. In the morning and, , the evening prior to bed, , thanking God for what he has provided for you for the day and, and what is to come. So, are, are there specific ways in which you see that, that people can seem to get more out of a gratitude practice than simply maybe, you know, thinking gratitude in [00:20:00] the morning and evening. Is there is there something else that that you've been able to implement that you're seeing success with? I do sometimes have clients do like a gratitude journal, which is really kind of similar to what what you're talking about. You know, doing doing a gratitude journal, writing down what they're thankful for you know, within their daily lives.
In. That's, that's really important. I mean, I'm glad you touched on gratitude because when you are grateful for things and recognize when you have gratitude and you recognize that it starts to change your thought pattern into a more positive thing. And so it's important to practice gratitude because it, helps take away from that negative thought pattern.
And it helps you to realize that you are successful, or you do have things in your life that are good and, and [00:21:00] pleasing to you and helpful. And so it is important to practice that gratitude. I've had clients Write a letter or something to someone expressing the gratitude to someone that they thought about in their life that had been, , very monumental and helpful.
So just doing these practices of gratitude are extremely important because it helps to change that negative thought pattern as well. Yeah, absolutely. And, , we keep harping on this, but, but, , that practicing the gratitude decreases that, that adrenal response, decreases the, that cortisol response, and it increases that dopamine response, increasing the dopamine and decreasing the cortisol.
Cortisol are going to be very important for you to be able to allow your body to heal. The, the cortisol response is going to increase inflammation. It's going to increase blood sugars. It's going to continue to have your body [00:22:00] revved up and always wanting to be, to respond in that fight or flight mode.
So when we practice gratitude and are able to really, you know. Embody that, take that in. It helps to decrease that response and really allows our bodies and minds and that fact to, to heal. And so I think that's, that's really important. And I really, really like that, that you do that. Well, well, Anne I think this has been great.
I've really enjoyed it thank you so much for for coming on and being with all of us today. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you for having me. This has been great. I've had a good time. We're good. So if anybody wants to get a get a hold of you, if they want to seek out your services you do accept most major insurances.
Is that is that correct? Yes, I do. Yeah, I accept most major insurances, private pay. And the best way to do that, to [00:23:00] be able to get in contact with you, is through your website crossroadscounseling. us, is that right? Yes. Yeah, if you go to my website you can request information from there.
It'll send me an email and my phone number's on there as well. So you can contact me through email, through phone or request some information and I'll get back with you. Alright, well great. Well, well thank you Ann, and God bless. All right, thank you. You too. Bye-Bye.
That's it for this episode of the Living Life Well Show. If you like what you've heard and want to learn more, or want to know how to put this into practice for yourself, go to livelifewellclinic.com. Until next time, this is Dr. Jon Skelton saying, go out and live the truth so you can live life well. The preceding is for entertainment and educational purposes only. It is not meant to be used to prevent, diagnose, treat, or cure any [00:24:00] condition. The information contained in this show does not substitute the need for a qualified medical professional, nor is it meant to provide medical advice or services.
If you feel information presented in this show may apply to you, we recommend you seek out the help of a qualified medical professional who can evaluate and treat your specific concerns.
